Do you ever see perfectly groomed women on the street? They looked polished, waxed, happy and glowing even though it's way too early for that? Perhaps with a child or two (maybe even three) with them? Happy children that aren't screaming and trying to rip each other's hair out?
I'm not one of those women. Those who know me well would consider me a pajama junkie. I own more comfortable pajama/cotton drawstring pants than jeans. It's true. I L-O-V-E some good soft pajama pants.
Also, just to be clear, I am NOT a morning person. In fact, my dream day would be from about 11am to 1am. Often I can be seen growling at anyone and anything in sight if I'm awake before the crack of nine in the morning. It can get ugly.
And because I don't think it would be a wise choice to let her walk about a mile or so to school by herself, I drive her. Most mornings we're running a little late. I've got my two and three year old in pajamas and I'm dragging them out without shoes or socks. There are usually tears from my three year old who is demanding her shoes even though she stays in the car for the short ride.
Now to the really good part.
Keep in mind here that I am the pajama queen. Although I do not wear pajamas to my daughter's school because I can almost feel the horror from the other mom's if I did.
So there I am, no makeup (because it's 8:30am and who in their right mind is up and coherent at that hour - yes, I know that is normal in the regular world.), dressed in the first jeans I pulled out of the drawer, a tee shirt and hoodie (that if I'm lucky, will not have smeared banana or whatever other sticky mess my two year might have managed to wipe on me), lucky if I've managed to snag a shower before school and been able to brush my hair too. No makeup. With MOM hair pulled back to make it more dignified.
Did I mention that I run Joslyn right into the school (we live in a tiny town) then turn around and leave because she knows the way from there?
Okay, well now that I've made that known... these moms do not do that. They take out their other kids as well, then walk sweetly into the school, sign in, take their child down to their room and help them switch shoes/hang jackets/get folder out.
I leave Joslyn at the door because I leave Keira and Eden locked in the car and I can still see my car while I'm standing at the front door of the school. Completely safe, but there is no way I want to bring my two and three year old daughters inside in their mismatched pajamas (because I couldn't find one set that they hadn't hidden either the top or bottoms to somewhere else.).
Back to the moms.
Dressed in gym clothes that are completely unstained and beautiful, with perfect makeup (and who does perfect makeup when they're headed to the gym I ask you? - HA - as if I'd know what people do at a gym), gorgeous hair and a smile on their face.
"Good Morning!", One of them smiled at me the other day. I could tell she wasn't buzzing on caffeine, she was actually happy to be out and perfect looking this early in the morning. My initial reaction was to leap on her and shake her senseless (or maybe something more drastic involving a shovel and her face). But then, it's not as if I would have won (and I obviously wasn't carrying a shovel). She looked like a toned, happy, beautiful barbie. That woman would've probably had me pinned to the pavement in under five seconds, all without breaking a sweat.
I managed to keep walking and smile (okay, that last part might have been a lie, it was probably more of a scowl, but she kept smiling at me anyway).
Now, I've come to a horrifying realization about these yoga moms. Their children are the same ages as mine, and I WILL be seeing them for years to come.
Point? I've started a running program to get in shape. I figure if I can't have makeup and be beautiful that early in the morning, at least I'll have a nice body underneath my torn AE jeans and hoodie. Take that gorgeous yoga mom!